Your Founder Psychology

Recent Turmoil

I'm displeased to say that only a few weeks ago, I had a severe emotional breakdown. I am 2.5+ years into my journey of solopreneurship and bootstrapping software products (alongside a day job the entire time, indie hackers conveniently leave that part out), and I have to say that my journey has been exceedingly difficult. You would think that I am a loony tune of a person if you knew how many adrenaline-filled peaks and dark, dark valleys I experience on a recurring basis as a solo founder. Seriously, sometimes I think people must look at me like I've lost my mind.

It's only thanks to other individuals in the space - such as Rob and Dr. Sherry Walling, MicroConf people, and a few new friends on Twitter - that I no longer feel like I'm some unstable freak; building a startup, especially a bootstrapped startup, and while you have a day job, is a journey of constant uncertainty, limited resources, experiments that sometimes lead to mistakes, and pain.

That last word really hits me hard some days.

Of course, those are not the only characteristics of the journey, there are incredible upsides, too. But I'd rather not pretend it doesn't have its ugly moments like the Twitter and YouTube grifters do.

Drowning In Comparisons

I look at the endless amounts of other indie hackers, build in public founders, and famous founders that frequent various podcasts, and I will tell you, friend: I lament in sad comparison some days.

Trend Chasers

I've noticed in particular that probably 90% of the most-famous indie hackers and solopreneurs right now are, interestingly, all AI people. Ironically, I was planning to pursue a Master's in Data Science around a year before ChatGPT hit the market. All around me, I see one founder after another somehow raking in tons of cash from AI apps that I oftentimes consider quite useless.

There are times I have asked myself, "Daniel, should you have jumped on this trend? Look at how fast they broke $10K MRR. You're 2.5 years in and not there yet, and yet some of these people broke the threshold in mere months. Why do you suck so bad?"

I've been tempted to jump on the bandwagon at times. And some of my ideas on my IdeaHub backlog involve artificial intelligence, I will readily admit.

But I decided not to chase this fad and instead stick to my guns: I need to spend time identifying real problems and removing real pains for people because I believe startups should be obsessed with pain.

I often find that many founders are trying to shove the square AI peg in the round hole; it seems to be working for now, but I suspect this could die off before too long. Only time will tell if I'm right. It sounds oxymoronic since so many of these founders have made crazy amounts of money, but as I've checked Acquire.com lately, I've seen that almost all of the apps for sale are AI apps. I think what I've actually been encountering regarding the AI founder craze on Twitter and elsewhere is simply survivorship bias: a good few have achieved wonderful success, but I think countless others are stuck in a rut with their AI apps.

In any case, I just haven't really found many use cases where I could use the popular AI technologies going viral on Twitter to solve any sort of meaningful, real problem for people. I hate to say it, but most real problems I've seen can be solved with boring, tried-and-true tech instead.

My Worst Critic

If you haven't caught on yet, I am unequivally my most toxic and hateful critic. No one except Satan puts me down more than myself, something my loving wife reminds me of when she tells me to ease up on myself and stop being so self-destructive.

Rob Walling mentioned that his wife, Dr. Sherry Walling, has studied and spoken extensively on managing founder psychology. Rob speaks of this in his book The SaaS Playbook (which I highly recommend), and I am so glad that he and his wife do speak on this because otherwise - as I said above - I would legitimately think I am losing my sane mind.

I have never tried something so unbelievably difficult in my entire life.

Twitter Is A Cesspool

I could write 10 blog posts on this, but I'll just give the short and sweet version here: Twitter has become a cesspool of startup garbage for me.

I really hate to sound so negative, that's not my intention. But I came in around mid-2023, right as #buildinpublic was dying, copycats were spawning everywhere, and everyone decided they needed to be an indie hacker influencer, even if they'd never built a thing in their life.

Now, I'm just drowned out amongst the endless thousands on there that are all clamoring to be the next Peiter Levels. The endless amounts of engagement baiters, word-salad chefs, and startup grifters that don't say many meaningful or sincere things about startup life.

I'd be lying to myself if I said I didn't also salivate at times over having that sort of fame; sure, who wouldn't love to be famous at times? Who wouldn't love to be interviewed as some genius solopreneur? Of course it would make me feel good.

But unfortunately, building any sort of audience on Twitter just hasn't worked out for me.

Being Sincere

Or maybe I am building a following, but it's just really slow? I've had more and more people start conversating with me lately, and I've actually had the wonderful pleasure of meeting some amazing startup founders lately, all of whom are bootstrappers like me.

They've come across my account very, very slowly, and I think that's because I just really cannot stand the engagement bait. I just can't bring myself to blast meaningless, empty startup quotes on Twitter day after day. I'm too busy working on my business, and I hate speaking insincerely.

I'd rather be myself and show you who I really am. That's what my heart tells me.

I just didn't realize that sincerety is slow, it takes much more time, and Twitter virality is the opposite of slow, sincere growth.

So yes, Twitter is mostly a cesspool for me now. But the good that I find in it is speaking sincerely and making lovely new friends, and I am overjoyed at that.

Twitter is now for friend making, and I really like that.

Mental Breathing

I think I've had to learn these past 2.5 years how to breathe. Not just physyically breathe.

Mentally breathe.

What does that mean? Honestly, I'm not entirely sure I can even define it right now. I didn't realize how miserable it is having to work on your startups only on nights and weekends while you have a day job, it's so utterly miserable for me at times because I want so, so bad to just work on my stuff. Why can't I do that? Why is that so much to ask for? But I've found out that it is a lot to ask for, that's why the journey is so arduous.

I've had to learn the patience of rocks.

This is taking time, and there's just no getting around it. My business has had solid, sustainable growth over the last 12 months (over 10x growth to be precise) and very little support burden. It's also profitable and often times self-driving on marketing. I really should be thankful, and I should celebrate.

So I've been mentally breathing.

Just breathe, Daniel. You don't suck. You are not trash. The Twitter grifters are liars. This takes tremendous time, your new bootstrapper friends who are farther along in their journeys (of whom several are now millionaires) have confirmed it.

Just breathe. Keep building. Your time is coming.

Upwards and onwards, friends.